Actively passive or passively active – Part 3

Well, the third and last part is here.

Editing is very similar to the writing process. How many times have you said? Right … this is the last draft before spotting a mistake or you needed to rearrange a sentence, or maybe I should change Tom’s name to something a bit more dramatic like Justin.

What? Now! Now, as you’re about to wrap things up, you want to change things?

NO!

Think in threes.

1. Write the story.

Leave the mss to simmer – a week maybe.

2. Check for spelling, obvious mistakes, replace passive words, check characters’ names, read it out aloud – remember your ears are your best critics, or read it into a digital recorder or similar and hear it again, at your leisure.

Anyway … leave it to simmer again.

3. Correct the errors from above and that’s it.

Now let it go. Don’t look at it again. It’s done. Finished. Finito, understood. Put into a drawer, forget it. Now have a short break and move on to the next piece. If you want to be a professional writer, then think professionally. Remember, you attract what you think. So think positive. You’re not an aspiring writer – you’re a writer.

Re-read the last two weeks and then come back to this. You’ve done it. Good.

Now, following on from last week. Here are some words that positively reek of passivity – passive writing. What’s the verbatim definition of passive? LACKS ACTION. Or as I like to think of it – LAX ACTION. Geddit? Think about it for a while. Let’s explain what I mean.

As Frank Zappa once said ‘Imagine …. hmmmm!’ Think of someone (your imagination, remember) who gets up in the morning, doesn’t wash, oblute, but opens a can of something (your imagination), sits in their comfy chair, throws their legs onto a cushion and switches the TV on. AND THAT’S IT. But wait.

Someone brings them food, and takes away their previous plates. They fall asleep. Is fed and watered for the rest of the day. They get up. Have something else to eat and drink, scratches their guts for a while and go to bed. Then after a night of breaking wind. They get up and repeat the entire process.

What I’m saying is this, like the blob in the chair: passive means lazy, lacks action, predictable, dull, unimaginative, uninteresting, BORING!!!

Point made? Good. Now here is the final list of words to eliminate, replace, or at least use in a creative way.

*  am

*  are

*  had (a hate word)

*  has (yes, another one)

*  HAVE (one more from my hate list)

*  it

*  is

*  been (guess what? Yup! Hate list)

*  to be (or sorry Shakey not to be)

*  there are

*  there is

*  there was (see a pattern developing here?)

*  there were

*  WAS (my personal hate word, like that)

So, there you have it. The secrets of editing. Hard? No! Fun? Yes!

Have great fun. Be stringent with yourself. Stick to the three sections. Remember while you are spending time editing, redrafting and ruminating, you are keeping yourself away from valuable writing time with another project.

Until next weekend, have a productive and peaceful week.

Remember, love each other, with honesty in your heart.

Tata.

Actively passive or passively active – Part 2

It’s Saturday. I hope you are all well enjoying a fine week. Right. Editing part two

Editing your work can be a chore or a pleasure. Whatever rocks your boat, right! Yeah. Personally, I find it a necessary, interesting pleasure. It’s like picking tics from a blanket. It’s something needing to be done and when you finish, you have a fine blanket again or you’re going to get cold.

Well, woopydoo – I suppose you could say it’s a blanket expression.

Now now. We writers are serious people, serious about what we write and how we write. Agreed?

Whatever! I prefer the blanket.

So when we have completed our first draft, maybe a week or so later, we polish our fine work. True? No … don’t tell me you do it straight away. Nah. Nah. Nah. Wrong in other words. Let your fine work breathe, rest, let its memory fade from your conscience. Move to another project and forget it for a while.

When you return to it, just stare at page one for a few seconds and focus. No, you are not going into battle, it may feel like it. However, you are going to fight Pa Ssive – the Moriarity to the writer and you are going to be Active (geddit?)

Most of you will be using a computer with a word processing program with a ‘find’ feature. Good. If you haven’t got a pc, don’t worry, you can still do this although it will take a little longer.

Right, back to the action. I’m going to present you with a list of words. These words are all valid. Words used in everyday language BUT they also contribute to passive writing and therefore are only the weapon of choice for the Pa Ssive team. Not you. Remember you are leader of the Actives.

‘Find’ the word, read and hear the sentence using the word and play with it mentally. What I tend to do is take the word out, rearrange the sentence without it, or use an active substitute. If you are struggling with it, leave it. It usually means your sentence has to stay as it is, or if you can’t find another combination, then come back to it. Do not fret. Move to the next sentence.

Remember, there are over 30, 000, 000 words in the English language. These words are often abused, overused and misused. So use them sparingly.

• and, but: These two often co-join two sentences. What will happen if you take them out and separate the sentences?

• that: ONE OF MY MOST HATED WORDS. Most sentences can do without it.

• that: You know my feelings. However, most people use ‘that’ when they mean ‘who’.

• just: Oh dear.

• very: How very do you mean?

• nearly, almost: How near, how almost do you mean? Again.

• really: Really, please.

• seem, appear: How do these seem or appear to you? Are they full of life?

• felt, feel: Ok, we’re adults. Yes. Right. So do we still feel, or felt something, or have we got something more powerful in our ammo store?

• begin, began: In the beginning …. When it all began…. When did we actually begin or began?

• would, should, could: These are grown up versions of won’t, shan’t, can’t. We all know what happens when we knock the ‘t’ of ‘can’t’?

• quite: How ‘quite’, not quiet are you? Quite near, quite far or quite close?

• few: So how many make a few? Two, a thousand, thirty billion. It’s all relative!

• rather: Rather what? Rather hot? Rather cold? Rather sweet? Describe how rather it is.

• thing: My second most hated word. Which thing do you mean? Things have names, so use them. There is no such thing as thing. Or, you are some unnamed, unlabelled, uncategorised creature from a horror movie – then you become a thing, because we haven’t found a name for you yet. Poor thing.

• stuff: So, what is stuff? How much is stuff? How stuffed are you? The room was full of stuff? Can you see where I’m going?

• anyway: Anyway … what

• because: Try taking because out and see the impact on your sentence and your writing.

• ‘ly’ adverbs: Many famous writers and teachers have advocated this golden nugget of wisdom. Listen to them. Please. Adverbs kill good prose.

• so: Can you think of any other words to replace so? However, Although, In other words ….

• then: This is a lazy word. Then he did this. Then she did that. Get rid off then and you will have power, impact, a life.

• even: Do you mean how level a surface is? No! What do you mean? As well as, in addition to?

• only: Only what? Only the lonely. I only said. I only wanted. I only looked in the drawer. Please.

• down, up: She sat down. He stood up. In these contexts, these words can be easily replaced and eliminated.  She sat. He stood. They are both fine and in fact better.

• got, get: He got what. She is getting what. Find another word please, something a tad more descriptive.

Oh yeah. I’ve got one more word to obliterate – WAS. More on this next week. GET RID OF IT. Rearrange your sentences. Do something, please. Start ‘A Hate Was’ Campaign. Something. Put ‘was’ into Room 101.

We’re there. Where? At the end of part two, that’s where. Oh don’t worry we haven’t finished with turning you into the Superperson ‘Active’ You’ll have to wait another week for part three, however. And until next weekend, I’m wishing you all a great and peaceful week.

Remember, love each other, genuinely.

Tata.

Actively passive or passively active – Part 1

Whatever!

No! Wrong answer. It’s one or the other. Active? Passive? ACTIVE? PASSIVE? Choose. Come on. Which one are you?

No! I don’t mean ‘actively passive’ as in whether you are a couch potato surrounded by chips, while sat in your Big Boy watching a game on your Cinemascope TV and how actively you are drinking that beer.

Or how ‘passively active’ as in softly, slowly, gently, delicately – yikes, so many ugly describing words; these ‘ly’ words aren’t good for your constitution – you are throwing that football to your son in the back garden.

Yeah, now you got it. Your writing. Has it got oomph, or is treacle? Get rid of the drudge. Here’s a quagmire of a sentence.

The man walked across the road.

Hmmm? Painful isn’t it? How can we give this very dead skeletal sentence some life, so readers can have some hint of what to imagine? Try again.

The young man walked across the road.

Yesss. Better, but it still lacks a bit of pizzazz. LIFE!!!! TRY AGAIN.

The young man strolled across the road.

Yes. YES. By the nose of Apollo, this writer is beginning to get it. Life streaming through the veins is reaching the pen’s nib. How else, gentle, delicate sensitive reader can you improve on the still dire sentence?

The young man strolled across the busy road.

Aha! Better. Yes, more descriptive. It’s beginning to appeal to my imagination. More. More. Ha! Ha!

The hooded male strolled across the busy road.

This is too much for me to bear. It is taking shape, form, structure. More, I tell you. More.

The hooded teen strolled across the busy road.

I am feeling quite faint. More still.

The drunk hooded teen weaved across the busy road.

Now I am feeling euphoric. You are learning well, little grasshopper. This is the way you should go. That dull sentence is now alive. Can you string your magic one more time?

The drunk hooded teen weaved across the noisy busy highway.

Then what happened?

Well … he died. Didn’t he? Didn’t quite make it. Shouldn’t go walking in busy traffic drunk or not.

Right.

Active = alive. Bring your writing to life. Be active. Passive is just what it says on the tin. It sounds it too. Pa … ssive. In the next segment, section, instalment, whatever you want to call it, I shall be writing about simple words you can leave out of your writing that brings it to life – makes it active.

On A SERIOUS NOTE

If you would like any aspect of English, writing, screenwriting explained, then drop me a line or go to my Twitter, Facebook pages or my website and contact me on there.

This blog will now be a weekly event. Hurrah!

Until the next time keep well and keep happy.